This is not a pair of scissors. This is what scissors are.
Some people make it really fucking obvious who hasn't been to Target lately.
"My god, you're like a living oasis!" I'm still not hardcore enough to have a picture for this. I should be, but I'm not.
Some days I'm tempted to communicate solely through Daily Dinosaur comics. It's funny because I could.
My chalk board used to stare down at me an accusatory blank. Not so much anymore.
It's funny because I'm in trouble.