the Ether Bunny (ninjalicious) wrote,
the Ether Bunny

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Dear g0d, I hate fish.

Ok, that's not precisely true.

I hate dirty fishwater that is always present in the rim around the tank hood, and that splashes droplets on me any and every time I open the lid, no matter how slowly or cautiously. I hate that it gets on my fingers no matter where I place them on the hood. I hate keeping bloodworms in my freezer in bags that leak out any amount of melted bloodwater at the openings, and little foil packs that breach and peel open. I hate how every single gravel vacuum in every single pet store looks like dollar store fractional-cent plastic parts jammed together in such awkward, flimsy ways that they're coming apart in the packaging, and the packaging is coming apart around them. I hate that I dropped 20 bucks on the best looking one and it [i]still[/i] was a non-functional piece of crap. I hate that while I am perfectly willing to spend $ on quality products, quality products for fish keeping are simply not available. I hate gravel that says "colorfast" and then the color chips and wears away just sitting on the bottom of the tank. I hate those stupid little statues that are open on the bottom so as to be light for shipping yet fill with water so they won't float, but grow all manner of YUCK in their hollow-yet-largely-inaccessible insides. I hate that Dirtball the droopy lionhead goldfish was so adorable yet sooooo filthy. I hate that my flounder died. I hate that my darling little dwarf puffers won't wear their beaks down on their own. I hate knowing how motherfucking cute they were while also knowing I cannot stand to keep the sorts of food they need anymore. I hate that they never puffed, not once, not even when the goldfish tried to eat them. I hate my naturally ph 6.0 tapwater that erodes my snails' shells, and I hate how the ph balancer clouds the tank and makes the water look milky. I hate how cheap and ineffectual most everything found in the fish department is made, from feed to water additives to decor to running equipment. I hate that however long ago I got a bug up my butt about having fish and ended up obsessed and eventually buying stuff before even knowing what end of a fish was up. I hate keeping this fishtank running and I hate dismantling it.

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